The Gazelle

Mark Ro #1 SF/PF University of Illinois

Star comparisons: Corey Brewer, Tayshaun Prince,Andrei Kirilenko. , David Robinson(character/community service), Angelina Jolie(lips), Wilt Chamberlain(with the ladies..haha i keed)

There is a mythical basketball player.  Andre Bargnani calls him la gazzella.  Pau Gasol and Jose Calderon call him la gacela.  Yao Ming calls him deng ling. When he tragically ended Ha Seung Jin’s career by tearing both of his knees up on a killer cross, Jin cried out “young yang”. But to the ballers of PS 111, he is simply known as the gazelle.  He is slender and quick and moves with a grace that is unparalleled.  He is Mark(us) Ro.

The Sports Guy once wrote that the first time he saw David Robinson he knew he was born to play basketball, with his bulging biceps and unparalleled athleticism. The first time I saw Mark Ro, I said to myself: “My goodness, he is born to play (asian church) basketball. ”  We proceeded to then talk about Illinois basketball for four weeks in a row because we are doods who didnt know each other, so we did what guys do. Mark is a superior (asian) athlete.  Tall, quick and nimble, he posses an ideal (asian) basketball player body.  His greatest assests are his height and his long arms, which he uses to be a plus defender in the likes of a corey brewer or an ak 47.  On offense, the gazelle uses his nimble body to make excellent cuts to the basket.  However, his skinny frame does not do well inside the key at ps111,  where a basketball concept called “fouling” does not seem to exist.

While the gazelle’s body is a blessing to his basketball game, it has also a tragic flaw.  Due to his incredibly large and lucious lips, Mark’s body can not intake normal amounts of oxygen that other players can.  As a result, he is often winded after one game.   Mark also suffered from the same chornic injury as Andy5 known as a “finance job”, but rumors have it that he has shaken that bug and the gazelle will be free to wreck terror on the courts of PS 111.  Off the court, Mark has won RWC Man of the year 4 years in a row(a la david robinson) for his community service work. He is a quality teammate who would offer encouragement, but he is often so winded that he can not speak during games.

he's faster on his hands than you are on your feet.

no challenge for a gazelle

Rejecting formal basketball training, Mark instead prefers to train for the KUMITAE

Helping orpahns. Yawn, what else is new?

Recap:

Strengths: tall with long arms which he uses to play good D.  makes good cuts to the basket.  Solid citizen off the court in the mold of a David Robinson.

Weaknesses: no stamina.  irrational love for Houston Rockets, especially Tracy McGrady.  usually diverts primary energy into non basketball activites like eating lunch his small group.  BASURA!

Best ways to defend:  Ask SG members to divert him to lunch.  Run around in circles in order to tire him out.  If all else fails, ask him to go to borders to read.  He will not be able to resist.