RWCBA CHAMPIONSHIP WEEK: GLORY ROAD EDITION

PARTY PEOPLES! It’s the week we’ve all been waiting for: the RWCBA Championship Game.  This past week, Rosen Ones once again exerted its offensive dominance while the magical ride of team Ruckus sees no end.  it’s a true Cinderella matchup between the first and last seeds from the regular season.  Ballers everywhere have been inspired by team ruckus, and RWCBA commissioner is in furious negotiations with Disney for the TV movie rights which will be airing on the lifetime network.  Highlights of the movie include john park’s “no one believes in us”, a shower acapella scene with walter, and clinton losing his desire to play ball followed by the obligatory “your team needs you speech” by dan. actors who have contacted to play in this stellar film include bi, john cho, lee byung hyun rick yune, and yul kwon as these are the only remotely famous asian men. after his epic performance in ninja assassin, bi will not be given any speaking lines.  aspiring actor doug kim is hoping to use this movie as a springboard to his career. The rosen ones are going to be portrayed as the second coming of Cobra Kai from the karate kid, led by ruthless Canadian gang leader andrew han.  sorry, but every movie needs a villain. keep your eyes out for this movie.

before we preview this week’s championship game, lets recap what happened last week:

http://spreadsheets.google.com/ccc?key=0AuUFUFrWrCr7dGdJSnJic0JXUUhaVm9FWS1XOFdJd3c&hl=en

game 1: rosen ones(63)  vs. JUNTAO(50)

in the end, the rosen ones just had too much firepower for JUNTAO.  frequently injured fowards Dongchul and Benson were able to play, leaving rosen ones only missing pinklion mark ro from being in full vultron form.  JUNTAO again suffered from injuries as big man Jung was spending time with his best friend Microsoft Excel and guard mikey suffered from an actual real life injury.  Jooheon Yoon proved worthy of his First Team selection, pouring out 38 pts with 10 rebs but ultimately did not receive enough help to overcome the young guns of the rosen ones.  ray lee proved that LASEK works with a solid effort, and mvp ronell was his usual excellent self.

game 2: team ruckus(49) vs. fade to black(31)

The RUCKUS continues baby as fade to black suffers a disappointing end to its season.  Right now, team ruckus is uber-dangerous as they are playing strong team basketball and getting contributions from across the board.  While Fade to Black continued to play strong defense, their season-long offensive woes finally caught up to them as they struggled to score in the 2nd half.  PG Andy Oh was inspired by Ron Artest and was seen out celebrating a birthday the night before and struggled to find his legs for his jump shot.  Captain Dan Kim hit a backbreaking 3 pointer in the 2nd half that put the nail in fade to black’s coffin.

CHAMPIONSHIP PREVIEW: ROSEN ONES VS. TEAM RUCKUS

while one reader of this blog requested a basketball breakdown of this game, this blog is going to breakdown what matters. lets go:

team names:

rosen ones or ruckus.  rose ones wins on creativity, but also gets a negative mark for being shamelessly self promoting.  ruckus is actually does what a name is supposed to by describing the way this team plays defense.  advantage: RUCKUS

individual names:

rosen ones: cool names: ronell, dongchul benson.  boring names: andrew, mark brian, jonathan,

ruckus: cool names: lamont, clinton, walter boring names: dan, john, stephen, david   advantage: PUSH

medical care:

rosen ones: andrew the dentist and two med school students in dongchul and benson

ruckus: physical therapist clinton  advantage: ROSEN ONES

WAGs (wives and girlfriends)

rosen ones: pui, haein, juliawang lee

ruckus: jenwhang kim, linda lee, mia joo,

a very hard calll to make.  as the RWCBA continues to look for sources of income, rumor has it that a WWF 3 vs. 3 cage match is scheduled between the WAGs.  No one wants part of ghettofab Pui, although there are also rumors that linda lee is a robot and not a human being.  negative points to rosen ones as instead of watching her man dominate on the courts, haein instead has lured mark down under for this week’s game.  advantage: Ruckus

will pui do this to linda on the sidelines????

Canadians:

rosen ones: andrew han

ruckus: none.  advantage: RUCKUS

pretty self explanatory here.  no one likes canadians.

so there we have it.  our championship preview.  this one is up in the air folks.  can ruckus overcome the ferociousness of WAG Pui?  Can the rosen ones overcome having a canadian on their team?  We can only wonder till this sunday.

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6 comments so far

  1. hooray for Hans on

    ur famished fanbase is mildly satisfied with dis write-up. u da man.

  2. mia on

    omgosh… this video clip is so disturbing. hahaha. hmm.. maybe i’ll come to this week’s game and cheer on walter. SOMEONE’S gotta take down pui… =D that’s MY boo!

  3. joooooo on

    poor choice of mini-video clip!

  4. your two fans on

    what a thrilllllllllling season…. end the season w/ a fantastic write-up! ruckus definitely had all the momentum going into yesterday. seemed ro-sen came out a little flat on energy and had some trouble defensively.. post da stats!

  5. ray on

    Thanks for all the hard work in making this league a success and a ton of fun. Hans for President!

  6. Lamonster... on

    Yeah Hans, thanks a lot for setting all of this up! Awesome job dude!


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