THIS BLOG IS WHAT YOU THOUGHT IT WAS

ahh autumn is here.  leaves are changing color.  the pangs of lonelienss are sharpened even more by cold weather.  pumpkin everything saturates the world.  in an attempt to make some money, ill be introducing pumpkin ramen, pumpkin pinkberry/redmango toppings and pumpkin chocopies.  no one can resist the evil schemes of bbans bo.

but everyone knows the best part of autumn is the return of basketball. and while next year’s nba season should be epic(259 days to lebron becomes a free agent and joins the NY knicks), we have the first season of the epic RWCBA league.  so let’s preview the teams:

team mikey:

starting 5:

pg: mikey choi/sg: dan choe/sf: joo heon yoon/pf: dave park/c: jung suh

subs: darren kwong, jason hsieh, hans cho, pat moon, ricky chan

single guys: mikey, dan, joo heon, dave, jason, pat

lonely single guys: hans and dan

real life comparison: houston rockets(with ron artest)

a team with a lot of offensive firepower but a lot of question marks.  Like the rockets, they are built around an unstoppable wing force(tmac/jooheon) and a fundamentally sound big man(jung/yao).  unfortunately like the rockets, their big man often misses time to injury(work or child).  this team also has two med students, so they may often be shorthanded, but at least theyll have good medical treatment in between games.  a high percentage of single men ensures that this team will probably play hard to impress the one or two ladies who actually watch these games.

in other news, the villain in rush hour 2 is ricky tan, not ricky chan just in case you were wondering about that like I was.  rumor has it that everytime ricky chan hits a basket, danchoe will be ripping his shirt off and taunting the other team with “ricky chan shot your dadddddddddddddy”

team jaemin:

starting 5: pg mike oh/ sg steve song/ sf aaron yip/ pf jaemin kim / c timo

bench: joon lee, jason chang, james juhn, jason yow, chris kim

players who are eeriely simlar to zydrunas ilgauskus: james juhn

real life comparison: san antonio spurs

a well constructed team built around a twin tower structure in jaemin and timo and the michigan backcourt of mikeoh and stevesong.  much like shaq, timo will be pretty much impossible to officiate in RWCBA.  basketball wise, this team will be going with the ufc pound and punish method, so as long as their guards can get the ball to their big men, they should be in good shape.  newcomer aaron has shown flashes of brilliance making this the most dominant frontcourt to begin the season.  the real heartwarming story of this team is the return of James Juhn from a busted shoulder, ministry, and marriage.  If James can overcome, these odds, then this reporter can believe in anything.  rumor has it this team’s season motto will be: win one for big z.

team paul:

starting 5: pg andyoh/ sg adam eldridge/ sf: jon kim/ pf: joe ng/ c paul lee

bench: fred lee/ al orn/ jeff fu/ rob lim/ gabe ting

player who asked if its ok to dunk during the games: adam eldridge

player who definitely will not be dunking during any game: andy oh

real life comparison: phoenix suns

RUN IT BABY. this team will be running the whole game.  led by an intelligent pass first point guard and an athletic front line, this team will be pushing the pace every chance they can get.  rumor has it that paul lee has already purchased 5 different outfits for each of the round robin games and joe ng will be debuting a new jersey.  this team has a total wildcard in adam eldridge, who recently asked if its ok to dunk during the game.  so im guessing this team will at least be semi-decent.  jeff fu has been attempting to grow the d’antoni porn stache for the past week but so far his attempts are unsuccessful. all in all, this team will be super unpleasant to play against.

team dan:

starting 5: pg lamont chichester/ sg john park/ sf clinton lee/ pf dan kim / c eugene park

bench: sam kim, david lee, walter shin, stephen cho, jonathan toh

players looking to become the single season rwcba 3 pt leader: dan kim, john park

real life comparison: golden state warriors

like the true original gangster he is, dan went with the all old school remnant ballers model in building his team.  it is possible that this team will shoot more 3’s than all the other teams combined as they have some some mad bombers in lamont and the mayor.  in the recent pre season scrimmage, dan cemented his donyell marshall reputation with a solid stat line of 10 shots taken, 9 of which were 3s with 10 rebounds.  this team is undersized, but should be able to make up for it with defensive effort and outside shooting.

team NYU(led by sam)

starting 5: pg: eric lum/ sg: mike chung/ sf: sam kwon/ pf: jooho lee/ c: kevin kim

bench: ben shim, john lee, sam chu, david ho

players using steroids: kevin kim

players with no strong nyu affiliation: jooho lee

real life comparison: a mixture of 90s knicks without ewing and 2000 pistons without chauncey. eh supertars, who needs them, we have a system.

sam kwon has chosen to build his team by choosing ex football players and NYU students.  unfortunately, this is a basketball league. BAZINGA.  haha i kid.   while this team lacks a true superstar, it has many serviceable players and should be able to play system basketball.   If Jooho can return to his previous form, this team has a chance to go far.   This team will be playing the most tenacious defense of any team in this league, as Kevin is no longer allowed to slam the ball after his team loses, so he will probably be punching players on his own team instead.  sorry fellas.  Rumor has it there also have been difficulties in finding a uniform to fit Kevin’s body. All in all, this is a sneaky team as they have many solid players who may be underrated in the eyes of others since they lack flash.  Sadly, this team did not choose purple as their team color.

team mark

starting 5(positoins unknown): mark ro, ronell john, andrew han, benson george, dongchul paek

bench: robert yi, jon law, brian suh, jon law

total unknowns: benson george, dongchul paek

real life comparison: spanish national team.

much like the spanish national team, team mark is a total mystery.  if they were the best team in the league, it would not be a surprise, nor would it be a surprise if they were the worst. This team has three solid offensive players in mark, ronell, and andrew and will be difficult to stop.  honestly, its hard to write a preview for a team of unknowns.

so there are the teams.  as for power poll for now i’ll go:

1. jaemin. the early favorites. intimidating front line.

2. paul. any team that has a guy who can dunk in a church league has to be ranked high.

3. mikey – lots of talent, but lots of question marks.  can the players make it to the games.

4. sam – a team with the potential to improve as the season proceeds if their players can run the systems effectively.

5. dan – lots of good players, but size may be an issue.  may be ranked higher if they show ablity to play post D and not get out rebounded

6. mark – the unknowns.  could be ranked first next week.

championship: Jaemin over Paul

mvp: timo

defensive player of the year: joe ng

rookie of the year: adam eldridge

commissioner of the year: hans cho

first team -rwcba

pg: andy oh

sg: lamont chichester

sf: sam kwon

pf: jooheon yoon

c: timo